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The Big O-No-She-Didn’t!

October 28, 2008

while my companion might be all daisy buchanan, this halloween i’m cinching the waist and slapping stickers on every visibly overwrought and misleading book cover, ’cause my lady of lit is none other than the Big O.

let’s face it, she’s a one woman crusade capable of turning literature into popular films.  her acting credits include at least seven books such as, The Women of Brewster Place (Naylor), Native Son (Wright), The Color Purple (Walker), There Are No Children Here (Kotlowitz), Beloved (Morrison), and Charlotte’s Web (White).    seriously, if she even looks at a book, someone somewhere starts typing up a treatment, like instantaneously. she’s that powerful.

so yah, she’s done a lot for the cause of reading and Literature.  but books?  bitch, please!  O’s recent endorsement of amazon’s completely retarded idea (a.k.a. KINDLE*) threatens to crush the delicate respect we have begrudgingly cultivated for her.  because we still like old fashioned stuff like giving books as gifts, and cotton, and live sex with actual people we’re attracted to.

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*look, let’s be clear: we fucking hate the KINDLE.  why?  check out RESTRICTIONS and USES here.  book: can give to someone else.  ebook: have to give KINDLE to someone else.  fucking ridiculous and shut up about how heavy books are and expensive and this is like the wave of the future and not just niche but economical and ecological, blah-blah-blah.  lift some weights and get a real job, you fat fucking stupid sloth.

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